Visualize Assertive Communication

Video Transcript

Now, before you ever even open your mouth or do anything to practice your new assertive communication style, the first thing that you have to do is you have to visualize the scenario and visualize your success. And what I'm talking about here is let's say that there's a coworker that you work with that you have trouble with everyday. Play out in your mind's eye, maybe you close your eyes, maybe you don't, play out those scenarios of what happens every time. You know, they come in, they get mad because the coffee's not made because you haven't gotten to it yet. And you don't say anything and you drop what you're doing and you rush over and you get the coffee made. OK? We want to change the situation. We want you to be able to be assertive. So we have to visualize how this is going to work out. So we're going to see this same person coming in, we're going to see them attack us and we're going to see us say to them in an assertive but nice way, "I have not had an opportunity to get to it yet, but I'll have it done within the next ten minutes. Is that OK?" Whatever it is the situation, whatever it is you're going to say. You need to visualize that other person saying "OK." And you need to practice this visualization over and over until you feel comfortable with it, until you feel comfortable that you can do it. That's what you want to do is practice seeing your success before you ever actually even do anything. And you can't give up on it. You can't practice it one time and oh it's never going to work, just forget it. You must practice it and practice it until you can see that you can do this.

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