How to Train a Drug Dog

Summary: With a few exceptions in East LA and the heart of the Ozarks, drugs dogs are not born, they are made. Mysterious men in black jumpsuits tape the dog's eyelids open and force them to watch Scarface and Snoop videos as they administer shocks to sirloin-flavored electric bones. Or dogs are force-fed every illegal drug imaginable, which results in a prodigious party appetite worthy of a Keith Richards bender. They become addicts of the most incurable kind. Why else would these dogs willingly brave the moldy back of a flower-covered VW van or a pungent school locker full of Pink Floyd pictures and resin-stained book covers? These dogs need their fix just as much as Scooby needs his snack. Or perhaps they are simply trained by a professional to get their kicks by making master happy.

Ray Varner has trained dogs for the Air Force as well as for law enforcement agencies. In this series of free videos, he explains what qualities make a good drug dog, then covers basic obedience training essential to the job. If Fido keeps his ears pinned back and his tail between his legs when you try to teach him to fetch, he may not be drug dog material. But if he jumps with excitement, then all you have to do is teach him to find a bag of marijuana or a vial of cocaine before he can play fetch. Then Fido will be ready for the drug squad.